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Swearing Birthday Cards

F*ck, they’re old! Welcome to the rudest cards around, perfect for celebrating old b*stards. Wish a Happy F*cking Birthday to your fellow foul-mouthed friends with our swearing birthday cards. Send an offensive design to insult your brother or tell your partner in no uncertain terms what you’re going to do to them. Why not browse more of our rude & retro birthday cards?

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Rude Cards?
Don't be shy we've all done it. Maybe don't be quite so enthusiastic as this merry bunch of OAP's though

Hands Up In The Pool

If you see an elderly person napping make sure to check their pule on a regular basis as they may be dead. A birthday card designed by Jeffrey & Janice.

A Birthday Nap

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Obviously we were talking about someone else who's much better than you. Many happy returns though! Birthday design for a December baby by Scribbler.

December Fucking Legend

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When you get to the age where having birthday plans with friends gets in the way of your preferred past time of sitting at home doing f*ck all. Designed by Do Something David.

Loved The Wonderful Gifts

This card says so much you wouldn't even have to write a message in the inside of it! A great birthday card designed by Do Something David.

Who Knew

But with rain let's be honest that's just your luck. A card designed by Brainbox Candy.

Birthday Forecast

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Eat up is a phrase not exclusively used by your Mum. This Scribbler card won't make you choke up.

Eating A Legend

Mother hood actually starts the first time you mutter ffs under your breath. A card designed by Jeffrey & Janice.

Mutter Ffs

Didn't know what insult to use? Well, this covers them all! Happy Birthday from Dean Morris.

Happy Birthday Insults

Well of course but either way youre gonna end up with a belly ache or a massive headache. A card designed by Jeffrey & Janice.

Full Of Wine

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Far out, dude! Send this cannibalistic card by Scribbler to someone who'd react just like that.

So I Told Them

If you know someone who doesn't look their age, give them this brilliant card from Jeffrey and Janice and hope they're not 55.

Happy Birthday 60

They may be getting old but they are still one magnificent bastard! A birthday card designed by Jeffrey & Janice.

Magnificent Old Bastard

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There's always one in every friend group. Send this Scribbler card to a lightweight who dies and resurrects themself again every weekend; perfect for predicting the result of a birthday sesh.

Being A Fucking Lightweight

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