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Valentine's Cards For Him

Looking to seduce the number one guy in your life? Browse our large selection of Valentine’s Day cards for him and shower him with compliments. You know, like how he has a great bum, and other equally romantic sentiments! Find a Valentine’s card to please your husband, fiancé or boyfriend and have him laughing with crude and punny jokes a plenty. Alternatively, check out our range of Valentine’s cards for her.

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Rude Cards?
cute patterned love card

Glad We Matched

Nuts about someone? Let them know with this cracking illustrated nut card.

Nuts About You

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These so many reasons you love them, they buy the pizza, spell you're correctly but most importantly they have a cute ass! Show why you love them with this awesome Valentine's card by Scribbler. Also perfect for an anniversary.

Reasons I Love You

Well, I guess there's nothing else to say really. Don't beat about the bush, send this Dean Morris card now.

Suck My Dick

Both boobs together are probably bigger than a heart so it's a great thought! A valentine's card designed by Studio Boketto.

With All My Boobies

Let them know their love takes you high with this adorable Lucilla Lavender card.

Love You Heart Balloon

You'll never be able to watch Next Generation in the same way again! Awkward Star Trek orgy, as requested by Sam Wise. Hilariously naughty Jim'll Paint It design by Lesser Spotted Images.

Awkward Star Trek Orgy

If you don't feel like playing it cool then lay it on thick and let someone know just how AMAZING you think they are with this Whale & Bird design.

Nicest Human Ever

This adorable card by Jolly Awesome is perfect to send to let someone know how you feel about them.

You Make Me Smile

Let your bestie know how you feel with this brilliant Jolly Awesome card.

You My Ride Or Die

Add A Name
You want the moon? Just say the word and I'll throw a lasso around it and pull it down! A personalised Valentine's card for someone you'd gladly give the moon to. Designed by Scribbler.

Love You To The Moon And Back

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Not to sound cheesy, but you guys are really gouda together! Make your partner melt and show them you brie-long together with this Sribbler Valentine's card.

Cheesy Love Card

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This is bloody disgusting and you definitely know someone who'll appreciate this brand of humour. We'll take the lentil thanks. Designed by Scribbler.

Fifty Pound Lentil

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They're gonna destroy your ring! Send your precious this hilarious card by Scribbler.

You Are My Precious

Add A Photo
Send your love to your favourite penis with this romantic Dean Morris design. Don't try and upload a dick pic here, we know what you dirty lot are like.

I Heart Your Penis Photo Upload

True love is them wiping for you after youre done. A card designed by Jeffrey & Janice.

Going For A Poo

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Anyone who doesn't know emoji's might not get this Valentine's card by Scribbler, but to anyone who does, it's perfect to send to your partner!

Emoji Text Wanna Fuck

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They'll definitely be cashing these in as soon as they see this Valentine's card by Scribbler.

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