Skip to main content

We use cookies on our website to enhance your experience. Click here to find out more about our usage.

Order before 2pm for same day dispatch (Mon-Fri) Kite

Rude Birthday Cards

Filters
Type of card?
Birthday
Clear
Choose an age?
Who's it for?
Rude
Clear
Choose a theme?
Choose a designer?
Sort by
Make fun of a seriously old specimen by sending one of the rudest birthday cards you can find that’s sure to leave a lasting impression long after the candles have been blown out. You have been warned: our explicit and insulting cards are not for the faint-hearted! Send an offensive design bursting with adult humour to your brother, sister, friend or partner. Browse rude cards featuring your favourite TV & film characters or fall even further down the rabbit hole with our swearing and retro style birthday cards.
Exclusive
Obviously we were talking about someone else who's much better than you. Many happy returns though! Birthday design for a October baby by Scribbler.

October Fucking Legend
Exclusive
If they're obsessed with The Boys, send Billy Butcher to wish them a fucking diabolical birthday with his trademark line. Designed by Scribbler.

Fucking Diabolical Birthday
Exclusive
They believe in astrology? Say no more... If you think it's all BS, make fun of a believer with this topical Scribbler card.

Star Sign Confirms It
Honesty is always the best policy. How lucky that Dean Morris has the perfect card to explain your RSVP.

A Big Wank
For such a pretty looking birthday card, this one's pretty ballsy! Send this Whale & Bird design to a gentleman in his prime.

One Year Closer
If you know someone who loves his tache and is well a bit of a twat, then surely this is the perfect card for him.

Tash Twat Card
Well of course but either way youre gonna end up with a belly ache or a massive headache. A card designed by Jeffrey & Janice.

Full Of Wine
They may be getting old but they are still one magnificent bastard! A birthday card designed by Jeffrey & Janice.

Magnificent Old Bastard
When your children are at that... delicate inbetween age, this will seem all too familiar! Give this Whale & Bird card to your partner to share the joy.

Sniff It Barry
They deserve at least a card for being the most fantastic bitch you know. A birthday card designed by Jeffrey & Janice.

Fantastic Birthday Bitch
The truth will set you free with this great Dean Morris card.

Real Age
This little snake is taking the poop emoji a little too literally! Make someone laugh and tell them to get well soon with this silly card by Tillovision.

You Look Like Shit, Dave
This card says so much you wouldn't even have to write a message in the inside of it! A great birthday card designed by Do Something David.

Who Knew
She Gave No Fucks Jeffrey and Janice card. The shortest most perfect story ever told. Janice should be everyone's role model. This card is perfect for anyone who literally give no f*cks.

She Gave No Fucks Jeffrey And Janice
No likes it when 30 shows up after being a fancy free 20 something. This funny Buddy Fernandez card is for that friend who thinks it's the end of the world for them.

30 Holy Fuck
Body Weight In Cake Jeffrey and Janice Birthday Card. Is there any anything more satisfying than a glass (or bottle) of prosecco to wash down a full cake? I think not. The perfect card for all those prosecco and cake fans out there.

Body Weight In Cake Jeffrey And Janice
Exclusive
Well, it's not a lie, is it? Send this card by Scribbler and tell it like it is! Make sure they can take a joke though.

If You're Reading This
Well you shouldn't be bloody looking should you Brian! Perv. Designed by Whale & Bird.

Christ Alive Janet
Give this cheeky Whale & Bird card to a friend who's child is *somewhat* of a handful. They'll totally grow out of this phase soon!

No Cure For A Little Dickhead
If they can't get the charade in this Redback card, then they shouldn't be playing charades!

A Body Part, You Say?
Add A Name
The perfect Jeffrey & Janice card to personalise and send to your favourite gal on her birthday. Hopefully it'll get a wine-induced giggle!

Fantastic Bitch
Say a very pimp styled happy birthday to your bestest bitch with this card designed by Jeffrey & Janice.

Happy Birthday To My Bestest Bitch
But with rain let's be honest that's just your luck. A card designed by Brainbox Candy.

Birthday Forecast
Add A Name
Send this personalised birthday card to a miserable old b*stard and see if he'll crack a smile. Maybe after the 7th drink? Designed by Jeffrey & Janice.

Grumpy Fuckers Deserve A Card

< 1 2 3 4 ... 38 > 890 Results