Pretty ironic that the card company consistently accused of going ‘too far’ with their cards is now giving advice on their own blog about how not to do that.
But here we are!
How do you nail that perfect balance between delightfully sarcy and downright insulting? Practice, but also, by buying a card from Scribbler.
See, we’ve been in this game for over 40 years, so we know a thing or two about what cards people want. Most of the time.
Nothing Beats a Jet2 Holiday Card
…and right now you could save £50 by ONLY getting them this card as a gift!
There’s very little you can do if the whole internet PLUS Jess Glynne is telling you that a Jet2 holiday can’t be beaten, by anything.
So all you can do is get them this card, say congrats on the silver medal and that you hope their birthday is almost as good.
Your Birthday Chariot Awaits Card
This is a really clever way of saying ‘You’re really fucking old’ without actually saying it. You’ll be basically finessing the system if you get them this card for their birthday.
Now all you need to do is add another, super smart message inside mocking their age, something like ‘They’ll be letting you on the bus for free next!’ or similar will do.
Quite like this old guy’s outfit, though, so at least you’re saying they’re stylish.
Clever, witty, and not too insulting.
It’s better than saying ‘You need to use more moisturiser’ or ‘Are you allergic to SPF?’ but still gets the message home that you think they’re getting suuuuuuper old.
Why the hell wouldn’t you be talking about the wine???
Your card recipient definitely hasn’t aged as well as a 2018 Sauvignon Blanc, have they?
This birthday card perfectly treads the line between friendship-ender and you having the funniest card on their mantelpiece.
You’re Aging As Well As A Phone Battery Card
Do you think our bodies go through a system update every birthday, like our phones?
Then one day we wake up and the update is too modern for us to handle, so our bodies begin to shut down?
Something to think about. Anyway this card is both hilarious and proven to be true.
The best thing about this card is that it’s a massive insult, shielded by a lovely little compliment.
That is, unless your recipient is actually, mathematically, really old. Then it’s just a nice compliment.
Honestly, get this card, it’s a win-win however you look at it.
