January, aka the bleakest month on the whole calendar. The one nobody really likes, even those unlucky enough to have their birthday then.
It’s cold, boring, nobody has any money and worst of all - Christmas is the furthest possible distance away. So, what can you do?
Send a nice, cosy, funny, thoughtful greetings card to someone you love, of course.
The cozzy livs has made turning the heating on a treat, so now we’re all huddling together like gentoo penguins to protect our youngest.
But it’s ok! Because it means you get to be closer to your fave, and your excuse is that your recent bill cost more than five avocados. So give this to your favourite human hot water bottle so they can be warned about your incoming, freezing-cold toes.
There’s a reason why it’s ‘January Blues’ and not ‘March Blues’. It’s fucking miserable, which is rubbish for mental health.
So make light of the lack of Vitamin D by giving this funny card to someone who might need a laugh or two.
In any relationship, there will always be someone with very cold feet and another with a very warm arse. Science doesn’t know why, but it’s true.
Give this hilarious card to your number one radiator to show them that you appreciate their heat-bringing cheeks.
No hoodie is sacred. It may have been purchased in a shop, you may have a receipt, but if someone want it because it’s cold, be prepared to never see it again.
Give this relatable card to the person you ‘borrow’ hoodies from to say thank you for ‘letting’ you wear it when it’s a little chilly.
If there’s ever a time to be excited by fresh PJ’s, crisp bed sheets and an early night, it’s January.
It’s basically a month for hibernation, when you can become your inner bear, stay in bed and wait until Spring. Perfect.
Honestly, just saying ‘happy birthday’ is boring, especially in January.
The least you can do is wish them a birthday full of crisps, chocolate, cheese and snuggly blankets to hide under. Especially if their birthday happens to land in Jan, they’re gonna need all the help they can get.
Is this the most romantic statement you can make in the 21st Century?
Yes, it is.
Show them you REALLY love them with this heartfelt, hilarious card that’ll melt their cold, cold heart.
