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Swearing Christmas Cards

It’s beginning to feel a lot like f*ck this… Say words worse than Bah Humbug and wish a Merry F*cking Christmas to your fellow foul-mouthed friends with our swearing Christmas cards. Our rudest and funniest designs wouldn’t be anything without a choice word or two to hammer the jokes home. Send a festive design to insult your brother, tell your partner in no uncertain terms what you’re going to do to them, and generally curse the season. If you plan on getting totally f*cked, then browse our food & drink inspired Christmas cards and get festive as f*ck.

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How did that happen? I swear it was only just Christmas last year! Designed by Scribbler.

Holly Shit Card

Scribbler

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Basic Bitch Christmas Card

Scribbler

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Merry Fucking Christmas from Wales. Mid Mod Cards by Jennifer Finnigan Design.

Nadolig Fucking Llawen Card

Jennifer Finnigan Design

Exclusive

What a sweet head he has! Celebrate the true meaning of Christmas with this jokey, nativity themed Scribbler card.

Let Us Adore Him Christmas Card

Scribbler

Exclusive

Hmm, if the elf clothes fit, wear them! Send someone this adorable Christmas card by Do Something David and make them go awww.

I Am Not A Fucking Elf Card

Do Something David

Exclusive

He only comes once a year so make the most ladies! Make their day and ensure they never look at Santa the same way again with this rude Christmas card by Scribbler.

Festive Finger Card

Scribbler

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The beard suits them so well though! Send this Christmas card by Do Something David to someone who would dress their perfect pooch!

Take This Shit Off Me Now Card

Do Something David

New In

Send this funny grumpy cat Christmas card to a cat lover who can relate! Designed by Brainbox Candy

Merry Christmas Middle Finger Cat Card

Brainbox Candy

Christmas caroling for the Tik Tok generation... Make sure there's plenty of ho, ho, hos in the house with this hilarious retro design by Do Something David.

Wet Ass Pussy Card

Do Something David

Santa's got a rather dirty mouth! But he's probably correct, so let them know with this hilarious Dean Morris Christmas card.

Santa Says Go Fuck Yourself Card

Dean Morris Cards

New In

Send this funny and naughty Christmas card to your partner to let them know that all you want for Christmas is to give them a good stuffing.

Good Stuffing Christmas Card

The Blunt Badger

Penis Christmas Card

Earlybird

Santa's such a jolly chap with love for everyone... but even Santa has his limits! Send your friends this funny Christmas card to let them know they're definitely on the naughty list

Santa Loves Everyone Except You Card

Giddy Kipper

The Christmas card by Pedges Houseboat for the Camilla to your Charles. Why not spend this year just the two of you and some f*ck off episodes of Peep Show?

Christmas Fuck Off Spreadsheets Card

Pedges Houseboat

Send this hilarious Gordon Ramsay inspired card to your loved ones this Christmas!

The Turkey Is Fucking RAW Card

Poppy And Mabel

Why can't tits be festive as well. All you have to do is add some tinsel! Send this silly Dean Morris card at Christmas.

Tinsel Tits Card

Dean Morris Cards

New In

Send your partner a funny reminder you won't give him blue baubles this Christmas!

Blue Balls Christmas Card

Rosewood Designs

New In

Ruin a Christmas classic forever with this funny card!

We're Wanking In The Air! Card

Tillovision

Add A Photo

Make fun of the family Scrouge by putting his face on Santa's get up in this photo upload personalised Scribbler Christmas card.

It's Christmas Again Card

Scribbler

New In

Wish any Gavin and Stacey fan a Merry Christmas with this funny Welsh card. Mid Mod Cards by Jennifer Finnigan Design.

Nadolig Llawen Sugar Tits Card

Jennifer Finnigan Design

Sometimes it's best to go above and beyond for your mates at Christmas so, get them this hilarious card by Dean Morris.

Here That New Dildo You Wanted For Christmas Card

Dean Morris Cards

Exclusive

Send this naughty Scribbler card to your husband and maybe he'll give you a good stuffing this Christmas.

Husband Well Hung Christmas Card

Scribbler

Let the festive season commence! Anyone feeling festive as fuck yet?

Festive As Fuck Card

Giddy Kipper

Exclusive

Send your girlfriend this mistletoe themed Christmas card but let her know you'll be doing a lot more than just kissing! Designed by Scribbler.

Girlfriend Naughty List Christmas Card

Scribbler

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