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Swearing Birthday Cards

F*ck, they’re old! Welcome to the rudest cards around, perfect for celebrating old b*stards. Wish a Happy F*cking Birthday to your fellow foul-mouthed friends with our swearing birthday cards. Send an offensive design to insult your brother or tell your partner in no uncertain terms what you’re going to do to them. Why not browse more of our rude & retro birthday cards?

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Page 13 of 41
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Who doesn't like the TV show Ted Lasso?? Know someone who loves it? Then this is the perfect card to send them this birthday to really kick it off.

Birthday Wanker - Ted Lasso Card
Add A Photo
The perfect photo upload Birthday card to send to a meat eater. See if you can rub off on them and maybe they'll rub one out to your face! Designed by Dean Morris.

Go Green Photo Upload Card
New In
This year send your loved one this hilarious Scottish themed card. To the none native, this translates to "You're not dead yet?". Perfect as a birthday card, a get well soon card, or even just to send a smile. By Rooster Cards.

Yer No Deid Yet? Card
Aye, it's pissing it down but at least yer still breathin'! Make them look on the bright side with this funny birthday card from Gie It Laldy.

Whit A Year Card
New In
Wish any Gavin and Stacey fan a happy birthday with this funny Welsh card. Mid Mod Cards by Jennifer Finnigan Design.

Penblwyd Hapus Sugar Tits Card
Let a sibling know that their birthday is their one and only free pass. Tomorrow, normal service will be resumed. Designed by Whale & Bird.

Tomorrow Fuck You Card
Exclusive
Your yoga-loving friend will love this Scribbler Birthday card.

Llamaste Card
You got them their dream present but the unicorn didn't shit gold so what even was the point? A birthday card designed by Do Something David.

Bought You A Unicorn Card
This is perfect any Bollock Chops you know. Brainbox Candy made it just for them!

Bollock Chops Card
Exclusive
It's a decision that shouldn't be made lightly! Know someone who instantly regrets what they promise? Then send this brilliant Scribbler Birthday card.

Anal For Jacks Birthday Card
New In
Let them know that they are older than the dinosaurs themselves with this hilariously funny birthday card. A foul-mouthed birthday card for friends and family with a good sense of humour. A rude yet endearing reminder that they are ageing gracefully. Designed by Ella Price with Well'ard Cards.

Fuck Me I Didn't Realise Dinosaurs Still Exist. Card
Tea > Wine I!m sorry but that!s not opinion it!s just fact. A Birthday card designed by Jeffrey & Janice.

Too Busy Drinking Wine Card
Add An Age
Whether they're 25 or 45, personalise this birthday card for a big kid and tell them to grow the f*ck up. Designed by Jeffrey & Janice.

Time To Grow The Fuck Up Card
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Why not have both? Or neither? Bring on those celibate bearded ladies!! Make them laugh with this brutally honest Birthday card from King B.

You Are 40 Now Card
Let them know exactly what you think of them for being born in March - the worst of all the calendar months with this birthday card by Filthy Sentiments.

March Twat Card
Exclusive
What a shame, however old they get it won't stop them from being a total knobhead! Send a savage birthday burn on their 40th with this rude design by Scribbler.

Forty But Still A Knobhead Card
Send this Portico Designs card to your favourite bitch on her birthday!

Happy Birthday Bitch Card
What's better than a big cock for your birthday?

Big Cock Card
What better way to wish someone a happy birthday than with a cock fest!

Cock Fest Card
What better way to wish someone a happy birthday than with lots of cock!

Lots Of Cock Card
Exclusive
Watch out, the bitch is back! Send this gag-worthy, Drag Race inspired Scribbler card to a bad birthday bitch like Miss Ra'Jah O'Hara.

Birthday Bitch Card
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Send the one and only Justin Bieber to hype up a total peach with this music inspired Scribbler Birthday card.

You're Such A Badass Bitch Card
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Send this rude, Line of Duty inspired card to call out a bent copper on their birthday. Designed by Scribbler.

Birthday Wanker Card
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They're also wise, pretty and wise - just like Annie! Make a Shrill fan laugh with this Scribbler Birthday card inspired by the hilarious TV show.

You've Got A Fat Ass And Big Titties Card

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