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Rude Valentine's Cards

They may be a pain in the arse but they’re your pain in the arse! If declarations of undying love aren’t your style, these rude Valentine’s Day cards are the perfect way to spice things up. Whether you want to throw a cheeky insult at your partner or seduce them with an explicit design, browse our naughtiest, most offensive Valentine's cards.

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Page 26 of 27
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Send this naughty Anniversary card to your other half to demonstrate how you'll be folding them over later on Valentine's Day. It won't just be a nose you'll be putting inside them! Designed by Scribbler.

Hanky Panky Card
Naughty cookie, crumbing all over the place... Send your partner this rude Jolly Awesome design and let them know they're a snack.

You Make Me Crumb Card
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A shared love of eating out? Send a hole lot of love to your other half and get ready to spend Valentine's Day doing your favourite activity? Designed by Scribbler.

Had Me At Rim Job Card
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Must have a lot of experience... in farming I mean! Compliment your partners skills with this hilariously rude Valentine's card by Scribbler.

Know How To Handle A Cock Card
Greetings card designed by Banterking

Roses Are Red Card
Exclusive
It's always the thought that counts, right?! The perfect Scribbler design for any long-distance lovers on Valentine's Day.

Using My Hand But Thinking Of You Card
Down to dunk? Let someone special know they're just your cup of tea with this naughty Valentine's card by Tillovision.

The Hot Tea For Me Card
Express your true feelings this Valentine's Day with this silly Dean Morris card.

Willy Card
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Sounds like a delicious ride! Let them know what you've got planned for your anniversary with this hilariously naughty Jeffrey & Janice card.

Going For A Ride On His Massive Sausage Card
Add A Photo
well, we know what you've got planned on Valentine's day! Let them know with this hilarious photo-upload card by Scribbler.

Jizz Puddle Card
Send your loved one this annual reminder for Valentine's or your Anniversary to remind them just how lucky they are. Designed by Card and Cake.

You're One Lucky Bastard Card
Exclusive
Show how peachy keen you are for that booty by sending her this cheeky Scribbler Valentine's card.

Touch Your Bum Card
Let someone know they're Cute as F*ck with this cute yet rude Anniversary card. The Anniversary card features an adorable little love heart character holding an extremely rude sign. Designed by Jess Moorhouse

Cute As F*CK Card
New In
This cheeky Valentine's Day card is perfect for looking back on your drunken memories together. Be proud of the start of your relationship with this card featuring the text 'I'm so glad we got drunk and shagged that one time'.

Drunk And Shagged Card
Make the most of Valentine's Day and have a bit of bum fun! Send this Dean Morris Anniversary card to your partner and see where it gets you!

Fancy Some Bum Fun Card
Add A Name
Aw, isn't that romantic? Tell your husband to save his money this Valentine's Day cos lube isn't necessary! Add A Name design by Scribbler.

Gush Like Niagara Falls Card
A funny Squid Game inspired Valentine's Day card, perfect for your boyfriend, girlfriend, husband or wife! Run, don't walk! Send this humorous card to your partner to let them know you're giving them the green light! Designed by The Cake Thief

I'm Giving You The Green Light Card
Send this naughty Ariana Grande themed card to your other half to celebrate either Valentine's Day, an anniversary, or just to send a cheeky message!

34 + 35 With You Card
Greetings Anniversary card designed by Banterking

I Love You With All My Bum Card
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You can trust another woman to know how to please you in bedroom - we can bet they've had plenty of practice! Valentine's design by Scribbler.

Just Do It Card
Liam needs some lovin! He will look for you, he will find you and he will seduce you. Rude design by Quite Good Anniversary cards.

Liam Needs Some Card
You'll never be able to watch Next Generation in the same way again! Awkward Star Trek orgy, as requested by Sam Wise. Hilariously naughty Jim'll Paint It design by Lesser Spotted Images.

Awkward Star Trek Orgy Card
Exclusive
Send this cheeky Valentine's card to seduce a damn fine lover on Valentine's Day! Designed by Scribbler.

Wet Beaver Valentine's Card
Tell your partner how gorgeous they are with this amazingly blunt Anniversary card from Dean Morris.

Holly Shit Your Gorgeous Card

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